My Friend

My heart is heavy for a friend. Last Wednesday, she told me that she was having an affair with a married man. This didn't match up with the story she's been telling me all these months about her next door neighbor being her boyfriend. This particular friend is not even divorced. Are you keeping count? That means that there are three men involved. Not including the wife of the married man who is now involved when all this finally blew up last week. My friend's life is a complete mess! She has lied and tried to keep this charade going for far too long. The pressure finally got to her.

I'm not really sure why she decided to tell me all this. Was she feeling guilty? Did she just need to talk and for somebody to listen (and listen I did because I couldn't get a word in edge wise)? All I could do was just sit in shock. I wanted to shake her and say, "What were you thinking? You are the exact reason we married women can't keep our men!!" I wanted to rant and rave! I wanted to tell her just exactly what I thought. But the only thing that kept running through my head while she was talking away and spilling her guts was, "Laura, love the sinner. Hate the sin." My heart went out to her and I felt a sense of compassion.

I've prayed and poured myself out to God asking - begging - for wisdom of words to say to my friend. The opportunity came a few days later. As compassionaty as I could, I explained to her that I agreed with her that she had made a mistake; she had made a mess of things. And that I felt the opportunity to start over began when the whole affair (and drama) blew up. She truly sounded to me like she wanted to walk away....she felt bad about what she had done, the people she had hurt, and she wanted to get out of the situation altogether. She suggested going to couseling and I gave her the name of the best counselor I know.

I talked to my friend today. She sounds good. She went to counseling on Monday and has missed three days of work trying to clean up her apartment (from a ravaging rage by the boyfriend) as well as sort our her thoughts and feelings. I, on the other hand, continue to pray for the words to speak to her. I pray that my life will be an example of God's plan for the marriage relationship. I pray that my life will be an example of God's everlasting love for her.