2 Corinthians 4:16

December 2002 was not a good month for me. I was nearing my 30th birthday (in January) and was probably suffering from the beginning stages of depression. I was not looking forward to turning the big 3-0 at all. I felt like my life was slipping away from me.

Even though I was battling that huge cloud of gloom, I managed to continue my daily quiet times and Bible reading. But God still seemed distant and silent.

One Saturday afternoon, I took advantage of the quiet house (I remember Wayne was at the camp) and opened my Bible and began reading in 2 Corinthians.

I love when God speaks, but I hate when he uses a megaphone. That day, I was sitting on the couch and the words to the following verse seemed to just jump off the page at me, " Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day" (2 Corinthians 4:16). In the margin of my Bible, I wrote, "30th Birthday 12/23/02."

I remember thinking, "Wow!" But, God was saying, "Hello?! Anybody home (knocking on the door of my heart) ? Are you getting this, Laura? It's not about your outward body. It's not about you getting older. It's not about you. It's about your heart." That day, my dark and gloomy life began to see sunlight again.

I bring this memory up because 2 Corinthians 4:16 was part of my devotional reading tonight. I was able to go back to that personal altar and remember. It seems so childish now, but God can use the silliest ideas and turn them in to something so amazing for His honor and glory. I know that from experience. And I love Him for it.